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Old 08-09-2013, 12:48 PM
  #11  
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Originally Posted by jcavers View Post
A funny joke? Woman's rights....


And before anyone gets butt hurt its only a joke

LOL, Wait until a woman reads this.
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Old 08-09-2013, 12:54 PM
  #12  
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Originally Posted by 1968dave View Post

LOL, Wait until a woman reads this.
i already seen it. it doesnt upset me at all
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Old 08-09-2013, 01:09 PM
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I got one... General motors
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Old 08-09-2013, 01:10 PM
  #14  
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Originally Posted by Daveh370 View Post
A former Sergeant in the Marine Corps took a new job as a high school teacher.
Just before the school year started, he injured his back. He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't noticeable.
On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in the school. The smart-aleck punks, having already heard the new teacher was a former Marine, were leery of him and he knew they would be testing his discipline in the classroom.
Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new teacher opened the window wide and sat down at his desk. When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he picked up a stapler and stapled the tie to his chest.
Dead silence.....
The rest of the year went very smoothly.
Awesome.
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Old 08-09-2013, 01:19 PM
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Originally Posted by greenheadkiller98 View Post
I got one... General motors
Hahaha
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Old 08-09-2013, 01:21 PM
  #16  
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An old cowboy - dressed to kill with cowboy shirt, hat, jeans, spurs and chaps - went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat there sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him.
After she ordered her drink she turned to the cowboy and asked him, "Are you a real cowboy?" To which he replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life on the ranch, herding cows, breaking horses, mending fences, so I guess I am."
After a short while he asked her what she was. She replied, "I've never been on a ranch. I am a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. I get up in the morning thinking of women, when I eat, shower, watch TV - everything makes me think of women."
A short while later she left, and the cowboy ordered another drink. A couple sat down next to him and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
"I always thought I was," he answered, "but I just found out that I'm a lesbian."
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Old 08-14-2013, 09:29 AM
  #17  
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TOP TEN PEEVES DOGS HAVE ABOUT HUMANS


'1'
Blaming your farts on me.....
not funny... not funny at all !!!
----------------------------------------------

'2'
Yelling at me for barking.
I AM A F-R-I-G-G-I-N' DOG
--------------------------------------------------

'3'
Taking me for a walk, then
not letting me check stuff out!
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

--------------------------------------------------

'4'
Any trick that involves balancing
food on my nose. Stop it!
--------------------------------------------------

'5'
Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.
Now you know why we chew your stuff
up when you're not home.
--------------------------------------------------

'6'
The slight of hand, fake fetch throw.
You fooled a dog! Whooooooo Hoooooooo - what
a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
--------------------------------------------------

'7'
Taking me to the vet for 'the big snip', then acting
surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
------------- -------------------------------------

'8'
Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests.
Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
--------------------------------------------------

'9'
Dog sweaters. Hello ???
Haven't you noticed the fur?
--------------------------------------------------

'10'
How you act disgusted when I lick myself.
Look, we both know the truth. You're just jealous.
--------------------------------------------------
Now lay off me on some of these things.
We both know who's boss here!
You don't see me picking up your poop, do you?


EVERY DOG HAS HIS DAY.
A DOG ALWAYS OFFERS UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
CATS HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT!









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Old 08-19-2013, 12:37 AM
  #18  
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First comes the engagement ring.
Then comes the wedding ring.
Then comes the suffering.
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Old 08-19-2013, 10:49 PM
  #19  
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this is funny but actually true lol.
Attached Thumbnails Got a joke?  Post it!-very-funny-quotes-jokes.jpg  
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Old 08-19-2013, 10:55 PM
  #20  
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Originally Posted by 1968dave View Post
this is funny but actually true lol.
i'm on the second so i'm doing good
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